one crab keeps kosher

in six inches of water,i was thinking about all of the people who had been attacked by sharks over spring break,in florida and all of a sudden something grabbed my foot and pulled me.

hysterical i jumped out and asked the fisherman if they were fishing for sharks and they said yes. my foot was bleeding and a very sweet teenager said a crab had grabbed my foot.that was the last time i was going to get in water that deep.eleven days later,i was in water only above my feet, when all of a sudden ,i couldn’t move and just stood there like an idiot pointing at a real shark,i hoped was a dolphin, but it wasn’t….

finally i could move and seven crazy paople came toward me  and the shark,and took pictures of him.he was in very shallow water and swimming in circles eating the bait fish.this woman , from georgia,got out of  her chair and had seen me pointing and asked how i saw him.i said because i was looking.then the people who took his picture tried to tell me how big he was and i said i know he was 15 feet away from me, but i really didn’t know :apparently he was six feet long.i never saw his face.so much for two inches of water.then there was a giant crab,possibly 12 inches around, who wasn’t even in the ocean, but getting a tan.he lifted his back,if the surf came close to him.

the wind was blowing 16 mph and i was thinking, this is ridiculous i feel like uncle fester and 2 seconds later, this man came toward me and said look it’s uncle fester to his friend.”what did you say ,i was just thinking that exact same thing”.

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