Even little ones speak in haiku at pool I

(little sister 7)

“mason you think
EVERYTHING in life is a race
since we were born”.

`
(lucy 4 & baby ziva )

“lucy wants to eat
ice cream and watch long movies
tonight daddy”.

(daddy)
“if you weren’t pregnant
and holding a baby
i’d pull you in”.

“everyone heard”
( daddy asked me if
i saw his wife was pregnant
i said we heard you).

lucy calling herself
vanessa and dunking
daddy blamed me.

(errin didn’t do it)
“don’t think errin has
a mean bone in her body
i think you did it)”.
““
(forty minutes with jackson 4 )
what’s that on table (10 x’s)
i mean what’s that on pole
what’s that on pole ( 4 x’s)

can you blow bubbles
yes you can have to go home
can i dive in here ( 6 x’s)

i’m a fish watch me
get in jacuzzi with dad
my mom knows how.

best of all moves or can’t type in bed

lived in the same house , until 1997. cannot even count how many times,since 2004 i have moved. yesterday was the best,of the worst.housekeeping was supposed to come at 10 am , move the refrigerator to find my mother’s pearl ring.no one came: at 11;30 i left. came back at 12;30 .no one on any floor. i moved away but very close.the door would not open. after the key turned fingers red a security guard opened door,said i should get security here to make me key cards.no one wants to or knows who will….so i left the door unlocked with jewelry and everything inside.
one of my suitcases is missing. if it had scarves i spent 1000’s of hours making, that’s not good.
at least i don’t have 50 boxes of my mother’s crystal to worry movers will break this time. being charged 500.00 a month by movers in maryland for that and 4200.00 for their pretend packing, when i had packed everything myself.
the wireless will not work. the vacation rental said she will email as soon as they find the ring.
27 hours later, still no wireless.the extension cords don’t fit , new battery. fire shot out of every outlet and it’s happening here too. wireless fixer , not related to olivia pope, said you hardly ever see that. he said i will come back tonight or anytime and fixed it for a few minutes, but nothing he tried really worked. now i think plastic is burning.apparently computers need to be flat, not fluffed up on pillows.

.can’t type in the bed.can’t see the tv . can’t move it.it’s attached to the dresser.there are no cabinets in the kitchen.you have to be 6 feet tall or have a 47 inch sleeve length to reach the disposal switch. the dishwasher door falls on you. everything is on the right , that i need on the left.

but i love the walls, lcd tv’s,ocean 50 yards away,on the 50 yard line of the pool,the jacuzzi is next door and best of all no one running on the ceiling .yes i would stay here for the pretty swirly walls .no 500.00 condo fees.700.00 a month including electricity ,wireless,24 hr security,5 pools, tennis, putting greens,ducks, goldfish , creek, cable,ocean, beautiful blue delicious looking crabs,conch shells, jellyfish that don’t sting ,baby turtles, 10 baby ducks, carp ….. d.c. area was 2100.00 for 1 bedroom and 300.00 for electricity, cable and wireless and they have no ocean.

silly thursday haiku

“Shopping”

one day in bloomingdales
this lady asked me
what country i was from

`
i said south carolina
we were in tyson’s
mall in virginia.
““
“No Sun”

two days sitting in darkness
need a flashlight and
yet they still got tan.
““`

” Expert’s Advice ”

have friends your own age
boyfriend loves you because friends
are eighty seven.
““

“Mafia”

smashing garlic takes
every bit of strength like
gotti murdering mark.

only 33 years now O.J.

o.j. would like a
new trial because he didn’t
get to testify.
`
if he takes the stand
he will be receiving
sixty six years to life.
`
diana krall jazz haiku:
“Let’s Face the music and dance”

“may be tear drops shed <—( by O.J.)
let's face the music and dance
humming a different tune"

family guy and jodi arias

family guy last meal haiku

“I’ll just have a salad
with dressing on the side
I had a big lunch”.

~

sociopaths say the darndest things:

“arias to reporter”

“if the jury comes back
with murder in the first
degree for some reason”.

~(maybe because you admit you murdered the victim.that would be some reason. i hope the jury, you know the one who would never convict you- gives you the death penalty tomorrow)

“extremely cruel”

twenty nine stab wounds
give me life and give her death
depraved indifference.

OCD , Humor & Morgan’s Dr.

one day morgan wrote how she went to the dr , apparently a good dr., who said she might have OCD. and i thought ,that’s the way it should be. i know a story of someone who went to the dr. and had to tell the dr. she went to universitate, no not in germany, in s.c. and one day in the very first class of psychology , there was a tiny paragraph about OCD defense mechanisms.after i said to myself ,i’ll be darn, i made an appointment with the psychologist , i had gone to when i was 6.(my mother had just died a week after high school).

i remember without people telling me, i would sit with my arms crossed and say : “i’m not going to talk to you”, while the dr. popped hall’s mentholyptus like candy and like she had OCD & offered them to me, also.
now, 12 years later i ask why didn’t you tell me i had OCD and she said ” i thought you knew”.

i was six. was i a genius? clearly not, becuase she gave me an intelligence test and said she didn’t realize how dumb i was a few minutes later.i made A’s in school. maybe she was trying to make me forget about my mother.

had she told me how dumb i was a few months earlier, she would have saved me from a brother who graduated 4th in his class at harvard , telling me i was not going to school in n.c., s.c. , ga…probably still being mad i didn’t go to schools he picked out in boston and california.

what if i hadn’t gone to school that day? i would have had to wait until the movie analyze this with billy crystal or the tv hit series : monk.

and i am like an idiot savant , a gift for telling people they are OCD now ,like guessing their weight at the state fair. they are so shocked i know. i should go tell the dr, who was still eating halls like they were going out of style.

hamantaschen,wally cleaver and nat king cole

“Love Prune”

i didn’t love him

man brought me hamantaschen

it was raspberry.

`

wally cleaver:

“it’s not so bad talking

to girls when you talk to them

like they’re a guy”.
`

nat king cole:
“Gee Baby Ain’t I Good to You”


“love makes me treat you
baby ain’t i good to you
the way that i do”

bought you a fur coat
love makes me treat you the way
big cadillac car”.