on the first day of hanukkah
my true duck will send to me
a round trip ticket to fly for free
join him at home in his palm tree
.
on the second day of chanukah
my true love will explain to me
how thanksgiving and chanukkah can be on the same day you see
and two lovely camels to wrap gifts and saute ghee
yes a big help to me
.
on the third day of hannukkah
my true love will cook for me
three somethings that contain no all er gy
no wheat no sugar, no eggs or soy & they’re glu ten free
they also should come in rhymes of three
.
on the fourth day of chanukkah
my true love bakes for me
four black and white cookies in the state of new jer sey
they don’t come from the south , not that i ever did see
wanted one since they were on seinfeld in a ba ker y
.
on the fifth day of hannukah
my true love grates for me
five potato latkes and one to hang on his tr ee
four black and white cookie
three foods allergy free
two camels sauteing ghee
and my duck waiting in his tree
warm paradise of the red sea
on the sixth day of hanukkah
my true love gives to me
six ipods he bought on the second day of hanukkah , yes black fri dy
(we don’t say day in the south but dy or some of us with accents sill y)
two for my camels,one for my duck and three for me
for home, land and sea
or maybe ipads actually
i forgot what he told me
forgot the difference, a little technical mishuggy
on the seventh day of channukah
my true love makes for me
seven spinning dreidels and a sho pping spree ee
wherever the dreidel lands he ki sses me
like an alle go ry
becuase he thinks it’s like a spin the bottle par ty
and that’s al right with me
on the eighth day of channnukkah
my true love brings to me
eight baby ducks and we wash them in i vory
no not dawn because they’re not greasy
then we have high tea
it’s so pepper min ty
we sit by the sea ,listen to sym phony
dolphin on chord of harp sy
tuna plie instead of play because they’re dol phin free
he pulls out the best gift and it’s not po ppy
hamantaschen with prune if you know my tummy
and a hanukkah filled with frui ty pas t ry
my mother loved jane parker fruit cakes from the A&P
and that’s alright too with me makes hanukkah christ mas y
–
*You can try to sing
To the twelve days of christmas
And you may succeed
errinspelling 
errin, this is BRILLIANT! oh how many New York, Seinfeld references you’ve included here,
i can barely keep track.of them all, like this one;
‘four black and white cookies in the state of new jer sey
they don’t come from the south , not that i ever did see
wanted one since they were on seinfeld in a ba ker y’
and then this, out of left field. and yes i know what ghee is,
i’ve cooked many an Indian dish;
‘and two lovely camels to wrap gifts and saute ghee
yes a big help to me’
errin, this was so much fun to read, ty for the non stop giggles!
.
it’s fun to sing , try it.lol
my favorite is the tuna can’t be in the orchestra, because they are dolphin free. i still have never had a black & white. bitter ben sent me a pic of one though.lol
how did you find a button to like olivia.. never mind i wouldn’t understand.lol why when you reblogg ,in that tiny reblogg box, i try to write a poem & it scrunches everything together.. i hate that….i would have at least put commas , if i remembered it did that
ha! such a fun, witty feast, errin. I picture you wild and happy composing this…thanks for the inspiration and joy. xo
lol it was quite a few months ago , at the beach;i’m thinking i was wildly hungry. xo
i tried to sing along and just got out of breath.
lol you’re allowed to stop & take a breaky
I did like three times per sentence.
you might try five after you rest:maybe you were trying to understand more than 3%?
I was just trying to get to 1%.
it’s hard isn’t it simplerbitterben? as long as your lung capacity is greater than 1% you’re doing good
It will just take me hours to read which I clearly have.
you clearly have hours of time or you clearly have read for hours, or both ?
I squeeze it in during work.
you squeeze orange juice during work?
yeah sure.
see you work hard. you can even hire someone to hold it like my hawaiian punch fellow
hard at doing nothing.
it’s hard to do nothing….just as hard as doing something
I just don’t move.
are you LOLeather ? can movers move you?i’ll call allied
I prefer Belkins because they are lazy and never get around to doing what they say.
my brother in law the meteorologist was the accountant for bekins in atlanta or florida or both.
was he lazy?
i don’t think so…that’s your job & he already had two others, but i think he has a lay z boy chair like brooke shields
we need to cut down some of these threads. there are so many….
what were we talking about again ?
i was just saying that we have about 50 comments going back and forth and I can’t keep up. so i’m just gonna approve some so we can cut down. didn’t have anything to do with any comments.
oh that kind of thread.. yes we do. cut them away..because we can’t even see the same day.. maybe you can but my arrow just stops & it won’t go down even as far as the entire day…we do we have like 50.. i was thinking 48, but you are the math genius
a math genius yes, 2+2 =5
my horse just said 2+2 = 5 in australiaislambisbad
your horse is as good at math as I am then.
you and my horse are twins.you count with your foot too?
I do kind of have a horsy face.
no you don’t, you have a horsy braid in your hair
I barely have hair. No sure how I could have a braid. I think that’s your other muse.
lol…if you rub olive oil on your head it may grow more and eat vitamins c ,e & h.
I think I will just let it go. Not too worried about it.
well i am worried,not about yours you are fine…if i didn’t have more hair than the play “hair” i would be bald, b/c it falls out all day & night
Just call me Hairy Bitter.
okay i will .you have one of those names that work backward … i just won’t call you late to dinner.
Always early for dinner, except when I’m late like on Thanksgiving.
yes you should always be called early for dinner,almost always except when you are called late….someone called you late or you were just late?
We drove like 2 1/2 hours to get there. It took us too long to get there and we were late.
that’s an awful long way to go to eat..
it’s cause i’m answering you too fast today instead of working & because you are basting your lamb or are you criticizing me,lambasted.lol YOU can approve this message..i am sending you potato latkes i just made.
I will have them right after thanksgiving. by the way, happy channakah.
thank-you happy bitter friday…what will you have right after thanksgiving?
some menorah with some lit candles.
is yours a baseball menorah with lit candles?
nope football.
i have a baseball weekly one in maryland & a beautiful glass sculpture menorah & 4 in virginia.
Hilarious! Such energy and delight here.
thank-you dan
I went to comment because the first word that came to my mind was “brilliant.” The first comment I read started that way. Laughed so hard while trying to sing along, miss errin. Sorry I’m a couple days behind in following but I’ve worked roughly 24 of last 30 hours on 2nd blog and still haven’t slept, so laughing at this with tears coming out of my eyes, and, yes, ben, I’m laughing so much I’m bitter about laughing. Y’all have a great Thanksgiving. I’ll be spending mine with Jon S. on the shores in Myrtle Beach, giving sunrise services with my flock, so to speak. Have a great week, Miss errin. You have made my day!
yall have a great thanksgiving; that sounds wonderful.you will be living high on the hog with jon s..can you tell me the name of your 2nd blog here? i appreciate your trying to sing my song
I haven’t watched enough Seinfelds to catch the references. That’s what happens when you spend 2 years overseas. Culturally deprived. Dang. Doesn’t matter. Loved it.
it was just the one cookie – the b lack & white cookie
I mean 25 years.
lol..that makes more sense because seinfeld has been on since the 90’s. will it never end!
Terrific Erin! This was great-I was laughing out loud-black and white cookies-ummm . . . Happy Hanukkah Turkey!
thank-you little dog happy thanksgiving turkey to yall & jack russel too. i know he has a new hat for the occasion
This is hilarious! Thank you for the guffaw! I really want to know, though– what do you have to do to get a true duck? Also love the allergen-free reference. What a hoot.
you just walk to the creek & a true duck is there waiting for you at 11 am or 6 pm . he either walks up his driveway or jumps out of the water and takes the bread from your hand.
I have to meet one of those. Typically they just swim away from me…
i have 11..some days 16…i’ll be glad to send you a few…when you finish feeding them, they try to follow you to the beach.
This was excellent! I’d even say precious in some parts, like the ducks and dolphin-free. Definitely your best!
thank-you maryanne
I always love your wacky humor but you are so right! How can two great holidays land on the same date? The duck being not greasy so not needing dawn to be washed with the dolphin and tuna references, for those who are trying to be so good for the environment and your mother getting a pastry from A & P, I remember those! The different verses made me laugh so hard, which is not too good of a thing to do, when I am on a library computer and needing to be shushed! Also, haven’t gotten up to use the facilities and don’t need to have an ‘accident’ here on this fine computer chair!
that is my favorite ,washing ducks in ivory not dawn.i didn’t know A&P was gone everywhere…they still make fruit cakes. they’re like 35.00 at amazon & i want one, but it’s mostly nuts/allergic
I think I bit my tongue trying to sing this. The pain was worth it though. 😉
oh i’m sorry.cheesecake will make it better
Singing is so go good for everyone… 🙂
Excellent. 😀