hot tub baby pool


“mom mommie mamma” (Father )
let’s get in the hot tub
no it’s a kiddie pool

(as a young baby
saying mom mommie mama
my crib many ways)

mommie thinks hot tub
daddy says a kiddie pool
she says it has jets

and she’s very wrong
MJ is underwater
daddy talks to him

then tells me
“I’m talking to him like he can
hear me underwater”

MJ pops up
“I can’t hear you when you talk to me

(you had to be there
hysterical family
one moment of time)

generals want your pictures

find you in playboy
and if that’s not bad enough
money goes to him

this is really a question or a public service announcement,interrupting summer. it really is summer in some countries, i keep reading. no one ever told me this before.if it’s true , i want to go there.but this is about generals at skype who want to talk to strangers and steal your pictures.

for two years, i wonder why strangers want to talk to someone they don’t know. i don’t want to be rude & hurt their feelings and click not accept, so i do nothing.i just figured they were people trying to sell something.

then a few days ago it said general so & so wants to talk to you & here is my email ,please accept.this was the second general. i wrote my birthday was in 1915,a year ago, thinking men would stop doing this,if they can see you are 99 years old, but it never stops.

so, last night i decided to google the name & see if it says they are selling stock in general dynamics or something & this is what i find: someone is using general x’s name and they would like to get you away from your skype account and talk to them somewhere else , while they steal your pictures.

OHHH..not that i understood, but someone did steal my pictures, without me ever leaving ,without ever talking to a stranger ,possibly a year ago. i was always hearing the sound of pictures leaving & i assumed it had to be 1 of 2 people , because no one else could. or the hacker,took them. Two asked me for a picture and i said you didn’t take 1700,teasing him, because i knew who took them, i thought.. he said no: why would i ask you . i said ,teasing again, i was trying to get into the mind of the criminal. he didn’t laugh …..

there were never 1700. some appear 25 or 50 times each. every time, you click the photo it lists the photograph again , as a new number.

don’t talk to strangers
they may take your photographs
not give you candy


hawaii and duck sauce


don’t want to see
tsunami coming eli
“me don’t wanna go home”

mrs. mallard flies
over your head to hear
jolene jolene jolene

why i have no idea
every sound sounds exactly
the same as rest

walk in the ocean
not even for hushpuppy
tolerate country

on no other nights
have ducks come to listen
below the restaurant

tuesday nights superb
if you don’t like “new york new york”
duck has no taste

would you like duck sauce
tomorrow i will bring you some
for your egg roll

thank goodness for leis
hawaiian dancers next door
drowning out jolene


shark sail sale


afraid of sharks
“another one bites the dust”
will not go in ocean

Crystal from jamaica
wanting to braid my hair
flew in with lizard

if you braid shark’s hair
he will never bite your hand
but he can’t pay cash

thirty m.p.h.
all the smokers have left
“everybody cut loose”

two men running dive
jumping into each other
one wears miner’s cap

they must think this fun
appears a little painful
replay many times

alcohol involved
everyday ordinary
you can make the call

turning up volume
people run away from wind
delightful cool breeze

“get in the house”
music telling the smokers
to go inside like me

cool but they’re singing
“hot stuff baby this evening”
” hot hot hot hot stuff”

someday i will ask
if they know what century
this is “kokomo”

we’ll “sail off to sea”
whenever music stops
“defying gravity”


what i learned ,in the last few days :

1a. my maternal grandfather was a major sephardic jewish family of the ottoman empire

1b. mr. mishuginah is still enjoying popping his bubble wrap, fifteen years later

2.i was thinking about my mother-in-law and found out she had died exactly 7 days earlier, at age 91. they said she would not live long because of muscular dystrophy & she outlived everyone.

3.i knew both of my grandfathers were named morris, but i didn’t know both of my grandmothers had the same birthday as one of their daughters.

4. i learned the census taker in 1930 was drunk, because he spelled everyone’s name wrong: my father, uncle , mother,aunts…i know they spelled last names however they felt like , when your grandparents came to this country, but this is their first name & thirty years later.


scott peterson hanukkah dreidel song III


he needs a food processor
so he can make chopped liver
but what he does not know yet
he’s going up the river

oh anchor anchor anchor
i made it out of cement
and if you had not caught me
i’d be in mexico in a tent

larry should retire (king)
give nancy grace his show ( i didn’t mean it)
she has many more expressions
than his do you know know

oh anchor …

every person here knows
you can’t put perfume on a pig
and when you go out fishing
you get saltwater on your rig

oh anchor …

after the new maid left
the mops they multiplied
never use your own computer
when looking up the tide

oh anchor …

he loves to do the yoga
make toothpaste art you see
he will never see a penny
the court will so decree

oh anchor …


Great Ocean Road


Return Address: Earth

On January 28, Uli and I took a day trip to the Great Ocean Road.  It was a long, beautiful day.  I had never seen a coastline like this.  The limestone cliffs towered over the coast, creating beautiful scenery.  The Twelve Apostles were magnificent.  I didn’t realize how large the formations were.  There aren’t many exciting stories to tell, other than the adorable curious koala who climbed down a tree to investigate our tour, coming very close to us.  I’ll let the pictures do the talking for this one:

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scott peterson “dreidel dreidel dreidel” II


i had a little anchor
i made it out of cement
and when it dried and readied
fishing’s where i went

oh anchor anchor anchor
i made it out of cement
and if you had not caught me
i’d be in mexico in a tent

the mitchell’s they watch football
whether rain or it does shine
but all they saw on that day
were footballs in their mind

oh anchor anchor anchor …

he spoke to diane sawyer
and did pretend to cry
but when he bleached his eyebrows
he got dye inside his eye

oh anchor …

15,000 on his dashboard
his brother’s ID too
his hair he colored orange
he was not going to play through (golf)

oh anchor …

scott will get his cookie
on thursday it is time
i must call my bookie
to bet he does more time

oh anchor …

i can’t believe i found many more verses, you are welcome bitter ben, for the dreidel song in your head all day.

selfie, scotch & lizard


“there goes selfie
you know who I’m talking about”
posing with her camera

green anode lizard
playing marco polo with me
for four weeks now

hope you are alright
petsmart will give us your twin
for seven fifty

swirling in your head
you can feel the vitamins
milk chocolate atkins

there’s butterscotch
scotch magic tape scotch on the rocks
and love on the rocks

jumps from bench to lounge
chirp whack o molE’ has forgotten
how to fly

he did it again
but this time he looks at me
first before he leaps

now he’s contemplating
jumping into the pool
potato chip thirst

you can put yourself
into mind of animals
know their desires

I’m “sending out
an SOS to you” my favorite
lizard mate



can two grown homes
live together in a third dwelling
that’s the question

will not be able
to reach the computer
on top of the Ice Box)



p.s. last email ” we will be there between 12-2 tomorrow. we could not fit everything on the truck. (uhoh – large 18 wheeler -major moving company) we had to leave a table & 30 boxes behind, but will bring them after the holidays…

seventeen, haiku tv, the funniest

“his christening
before they broke the champagne bottle
over his head”
Gracie’s Uncle Harvey

“i heard your mamma
rang a guy’s bells all the way
to heaven tonight”
Mike and Molly

“at your age
you shouldn’t look at furniture
unless it has a lid”
Frank Barone to Marie

“don’t use the woman
who’s sleeping with my girlfriend
to try to flip me”
The Good Wife

“really don’t like
how your wings poke me when we sleep
cause you’re an angel”
Big Bang Theory

“sixty percent
believe the noah’s ark story
is completely true”
Bill Maher /HBO

“stan’s cousin
the diabetic is visiting
from arizona”
Marie Barone

“the cow gives all the milk
but the bull gets the blue ribbon
a man’s world”
Gracie Allen


sung to I had a little dreydl


scott peterson hanukkah song:

in jail no lovely bodies
just the voices in your head
no strip clubs or hot toddies
and bay mosquitoes in your bed

oh scotty, scotty , scotty….

his uncle’s from alaska
he sees scott once a year
if it had been more often
he’d be crying in his beer

oh scotty, scotty, scotty…

the jury is so bored
yes they try to stay awake
it helps when every witness
says the wrong decision they did make

oh scotty, scotty, scotty…

mark is going to blow it
the jury is asleep
judge D said no more sympathy
but mark told you know who to weep

oh, scotty, scotty, scotty…

(first you have to have followed the trial, remembered for ten years & then you would have to know this song :

“i had a little dreydl
i made it out of clay
and when it’s dry & ready
then dreydyl i shall play”

& how many people could that be?

Band Camp wrote the oh scotty,scotty, scotty part & I cannot remember the words)