your best bitter february friend forever and mine bitter ben

“nothing gets me up
faster in the morning than
two charley horses”

“wouldn’t it be nice
to shorten this phrase somehow
best friend forever”

(i know you wanted
to shorten this phrase
yet i made it much longer)

“i have so much to do
so little motivation
to do it with”

” when i say that
i am going to do my best
i do not mean it”

“do not be a hater
because my wife thrifted
this awesome jacket”

“ben needs instructions
to open a granola bar
he almost starved”

“if you spend
10,000 hours doing something
you are an expert”

“why is that old guy
always telling me to get
my billions back”

(you should hear
what the guy in the turban told me
from that company)

“we might accomplish
something in a meeting
when flying cars arrive”

(you accomplish haiku
without even knowing
what more can one ask)

“SNL forty
where is my celebration
i am forty one”

“happy pizza day”
yet it’s never gluten free
always on friday

“one hundred percent
keeping all resolutions
made january”

(on february 2)

(found this place twitter
i have never been there once
yet i’m a member

since two thousand twelve
julie andrews and sean penn
were following me

spending four hours
last night trying to log in
the very first time)



haiku tv twenty three, it’s Gracie

“oh will you get
some ginger ale the chicken
may not like straight bourbon”

“i know you men
would like to be alone so if
i leave you will be”

“couldn’t afford
metronome so my mother turned on
windshield wipers”


“carl what have i told you
about not using jesus
as your wing man”

“you don’t have to become
a nun to have a relationship
with G-d”

Mike and Molly

“my conscious doesn’t
take time off just because
i have an erection”

“the fact that his fridge
isn’t full of women’s heads
is a miracle”

Hello Ladies
* i meant to hit preview not publish: 21 & 22 haven’t been published yet.

secret service ducks two & shark on thirteenth

coming down the hill
hungry ducks meet you half way
reaching salt water

a little patience
not a fan of silly one
firmly poking shin

yellow beak knocking
three times not on the ceiling
pointing stay no no

understanding words
certain this isn’t the first time
he has heard no

long blond hair cowgirl
her husband hello on by
ten minutes later

they have great tans
before catching up they ask
will you come and join us

in the shade
a man is playing his guitar
starting to hum a song

legs dangling over
inspiring table
where thoughts usually sit

from the thirteenth floor
they saw a hammerhead shark
arms can’t stretch that wide

enjoy seeing whale
lift it’s tail to say hello
not too much of him

pierre and his gang
they know how to close a door
shut and lock tightly

when a car backfires
they assume this a gun
shut, surround and protect


I’ll Meet You Halfway

“that’s better than no way
there must be someway
to get it together”

Partridge Family


horizontal horizon

almost horizon
you see a very large kite
impossible sight

this very moment
turns and starts heading toward
fear combatant plane

then you see kind birds
forgotten about blackbirds
until you sit down

coming from the north
they fly in so many patterns
like band practice

who is their teacher
not even any music
without a whistle

best performance
they are taking my breath away
standing ovation

be very quiet
there’s a cute guy sleeping
behind in a lounge chair

book put him to sleep
until he snores once again
so we cannot clap


Wally Weatherholt /Alligator takes your hand and you go to jail


i cannot believe after the chalk incident ,when timothy osmar,  was sent to jail for 18 days  for writing on the sidewalk in pink chalk, which is illegal in orlando, unless  mayor  dyer tells you to chalk the sidewalks.wait, no it’s illegal even when he tells you to do this.tim  osmar sued and orlando lost.

they actually arrested wally weatherholt. the alligator took his left hand.they said they would investigate and after a month , they arrested him.he was released on 1000.00 bond but could face 60 days in jail and a fine of 500.00.the crazy things they do in florida.they have so much room in jail.maybe they do.many people like  hector rodriguez and jesse brandon davis were running around shooting people like donovan dirocco and  murdering jeremy and nicholas….

i’m sorry but wally weatherholt is not going to feed any other alligators. he has suffered and will always suffer and putting…

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pink pampas poodle

light pink pampas
oysters rockerfellering themselves
under the bridge

one man in the crowd
wearing black bikini while
kicking round green ball

parallel to sea
all the way to ocean’s creek
his ball boomerangs

when finally meet
still playing boomerang
thirty minutes later

dogs love october
walking and wagging all day
no waiting til five

walking their parents
backseat drivers in golf carts
sipping in the sea

annie the poodle
almost on her way home
jumps out of her golf cart

wanted to say hi
her mother saying she knows
only met three times

poodle translation
would you like to ride home with me
in my golf cart