permission to board

~
i pet a dog and
i liked it he was tall
no leaning over
~
balcony cardinal
girlfriend flew up to meet him
he fed her by beak.
~
if the dolphin feel
like coming to the boat
they have permission.
~

while in the restroom
her husband bought a car
couple were engaged

~
fighting for land
haven’t “come a long way baby”
five thousand years
~
“don’t go in seven feet
mama knows CPR
but she can’t swim”.
~
kuthrapoly,
poly sci,polly want a cracker,
polygamy

~
ducks politely surround
until bread goes
inside their mouths.

~
“feel free to do
other things while you wait”
thank-you computer.
~
mom says stop kicking
dad says leave here alone
just having fun
~
how old is too old
to cry because you don’t
want to go home.

~
“why would i bring
your sunglasses” maybe because
you love your husband.
~

barely conscious stream

`
deviled crabs
tiny pitchforks chasing you
across the sand.

`
rice krispie treats
falling in bikini top
uncomfortable.

`

married on beach
dolphins are your witnesses
miami dolphins.

`
smith party of six
party of five
one died in line.

`
“Pyramid Scheme”

send us picture
imaginary money
we make blogging ?

`

my father said
“good thing you aren’t
allergic to money”.

`

you’re in a pickle
i can’t help you
i hate vinegar.
.
cucumbers are
notorious for heartburn
double negative.
`
“you hold your liquor
better than i do peggy.
long island iced tea”.
.
i hold my liquor
just like the next man
with my hands.

`
watch out for
piranha in jacuzzi
he hasn’t eaten.

`
tropical depression
sadness because summer
left the building.

`

“They Give To Me”
haven’t ever
given anyone anything
contagious.

`
“which ad experience
do you prefer”
none nada zip.

`
where were you
when the lights went out ?
in a haiku.

`
“No More Alimony”
Art Cashin

” ben bernanke flies
over your house drops
million dollars”.

`
“Walking on Beach”

like to turn around
make sure no one following
shouting haiku.

one crab keeps kosher

in six inches of water,i was thinking about all of the people who had been attacked by sharks over spring break,in florida and all of a sudden something grabbed my foot and pulled me.

hysterical i jumped out and asked the fisherman if they were fishing for sharks and they said yes. my foot was bleeding and a very sweet teenager said a crab had grabbed my foot.that was the last time i was going to get in water that deep.eleven days later,i was in water only above my feet, when all of a sudden ,i couldn’t move and just stood there like an idiot pointing at a real shark,i hoped was a dolphin, but it wasn’t….

finally i could move and seven crazy paople came toward me  and the shark,and took pictures of him.he was in very shallow water and swimming in circles eating the bait fish.this woman , from georgia,got out of  her chair and had seen me pointing and asked how i saw him.i said because i was looking.then the people who took his picture tried to tell me how big he was and i said i know he was 15 feet away from me, but i really didn’t know :apparently he was six feet long.i never saw his face.so much for two inches of water.then there was a giant crab,possibly 12 inches around, who wasn’t even in the ocean, but getting a tan.he lifted his back,if the surf came close to him.

the wind was blowing 16 mph and i was thinking, this is ridiculous i feel like uncle fester and 2 seconds later, this man came toward me and said look it’s uncle fester to his friend.”what did you say ,i was just thinking that exact same thing”.