chanukkahturkekahgibletkah

on the first day of hanukkah
my true duck will send to me
a round trip ticket to fly for free
join him at home in his palm tree
.
on the second day of chanukah
my true love will explain to me
how thanksgiving and chanukkah can be on the same day you see
and two lovely camels to wrap gifts and saute ghee
yes a big help to me
.
on the third day of hannukkah
my true love will cook for me
three somethings that contain no all er gy
no wheat no sugar, no eggs or soy & they’re glu ten free
they also should come in rhymes of three
.
on the fourth day of chanukkah
my true love bakes for me
four black and white cookies in the state of new jer sey
they don’t come from the south , not that i ever did see
wanted one since they were on seinfeld in a ba ker y
.
on the fifth day of hannukah
my true love grates for me
five potato latkes and one to hang on his tr ee
four black and white cookie
three foods allergy free
two camels sauteing ghee
and my duck waiting in his tree
warm paradise of the red sea

on the sixth day of hanukkah
my true love gives to me
six ipods he bought on the second day of hanukkah , yes black fri dy
(we don’t say day in the south but dy or some of us with accents sill y)
two for my camels,one for my duck and three for me
for home, land and sea
or maybe ipads actually
i forgot what he told me
forgot the difference, a little technical mishuggy

on the seventh day of channukah
my true love makes for me
seven spinning dreidels and a sho pping spree ee
wherever the dreidel lands he ki sses me
like an alle go ry
becuase he thinks it’s like a spin the bottle par ty
and that’s al right with me

on the eighth day of channnukkah
my true love brings to me
eight baby ducks and we wash them in i vory
no not dawn because they’re not greasy
then we have high tea
it’s so pepper min ty
we sit by the sea ,listen to sym phony
dolphin on chord of harp sy
tuna plie instead of play because they’re dol phin free
he pulls out the best gift and it’s not po ppy
hamantaschen with prune if you know my tummy
and a hanukkah filled with frui ty pas t ry
my mother loved jane parker fruit cakes from the A&P
and that’s alright too with me makes hanukkah christ mas y


*You can try to sing
To the twelve days of christmas
And you may succeed

summer with an S & starfish

i found a starfish
wanted to place him deeper
perfectly healthy

the diagnosis
remembered two bikinis
saving one life hey

i have bikini
mr mullet can go deep
saving starfish life

little boy stops me
angler wanted the starfish
not to save his life

he said they can’t live
washing ashore is not good
can’t leave their coral.

i say poppycock
only bikinis can save
starfish it seems.
`

sea sun swim splash
surfing shells sauna sip
suntan shower sleep

senora sundae
salmon swordfish strawberry
sandals shorts sup
`
The Lift

third floor please exit
shaking head no wrong floor
they keep motioning

no i want first
you will not fool me this time
“coming from the beach ?

well you’re dressed like it”
no i’m going TO the beach
you had two guesses

(if i’m going down
and my hair isn’t wind blown
and i am not wet)

“how long have you been
here” one year and four weeks
i talk in haiku .
`
Waterfall

i see you cutie
don’t have to bite my finger off
or jump for the bread

ducks are like dogs
see how close we can stand
wiggle our tails.
`
Speaking Of Tails

when i was supping
brother in law a dentist
dining on a tail

i was horrified
said hoping i wouldn’t see
a delicacy

fish was caught by moi
no one to blame but myself
husband who taught me.
`

Sunshine On My Shoulder Makes Me Sunburned

computer said zero
percent chance of rain until
seven p m

one thirty drizzling
on my toes very wet
raindrops sunglasses

clouds blowing fast
will stop in a few minutes
sunshine appears

two hours in the sand

do sheep get itchy
are some allergic to wool
you have to wonder.
`
Sophie the Dog

sophie was all wet
she looked at parents like they
pushed her into hole

hole in the ocean
she misjudged no judging
told me her plight

she told me to walk
very warm at the ocean
windy here by ducks

she stands far away
knowing duck could pull her in
felipe is tricky.
`
In the Sand

almost erased
i love nolan and conner
by the next waves

( i love conner too
scott peterson erased him
erased laci too ).

Mr. Blond Mullet

he caught two blue fish
one as i walked behind him
return second blue

while i was away
shark jumped on his minnow
snapped thirty test.
`
An Old Seventeen

sweet home schooled boy
“are you that jewish lady
from last october ”

five two and five ten
sinking deeper into sand
teenager and i .

every october
he said “keep up the good work”
told him to “drive safe ”

we laugh at silly
expressions people say to us
” you’re doin it ”

“Stay There”

remember last year
he crossed the creek at high tide
to tell me something.

Family Walk

sister walks head down
three miles searching for shark teeth
today she found two .
`
Black Dress & Eyeshadow

you look so pretty
” i’m doing a model shoot ”
six year old child .

White Doggy

twelve year old lucy
pink t shirt avoid sunburn
” i love my daddy “.

haiku, sea ku

no such thing as a
gefilte fish it’s carp white
fish or whatever.
.
Squeaky Clean

it’s coming from
outside the house note on door
i’m in the shower

note has been on door
since tuesday it’s thursday now
what a dumb pumpkin.
.
if i was a ferret
would have died twelve times
last thirteen years.
.
october fishermen
like to tap my head daily
with red test line .
.

ten pink jellyfish
that’s how far i walked not
very far at all.
.
annie and moon pie
two king charles spaniel puppies
stop me coming back.
.
seventeen jellies
little did i know friday
there would be hundreds.
.
we are like two ships
colliding in the night
stuck together.
.
amazing jet ski
dolphin tours do you watch them
or do they watch you ?
.
“daddy can i take
a hot shower no you can
take an ice cold one”.

`
I Saw Stars
Etta Jones

” i heard a birdie
sing so sweet so sweet the
moment i fell for you ” …
.
Cold as Ice

“you’re as cold as ice
someday you’ll pay the price i
know want paradise ” …

dolphin, sunny and 76

~
i was closing in
three ducks walk up diving board
said i’m sorry

i have no bread now
they walk back down the ramp
despising my guts.
.

if i had a nickel
for every time my husband said
don’t stand still

stay in the car don’t
stand still they got me today
wasn’t standing still.

(red ant)
~

(way way way out thinking / i’m not batman)

master waist deep throws
ball way out to sea dog swims
over waves fetching

wearing red leash
ready to help dog ,punch man
spot fins behind dog

five dolphin playing
spinning around dolphin flashes
want to play too

ocean a gorgeous blue
mullet pirouette
dolphin demi plie .
~
two men and their partial
haiku :
.
Testing the Water
.

i step into pool
man says “it’s only cool
to the touch” funny guy.

Walking on Beach
.

“you live here don’t you?
every time i come
keep up the good work” okay.

permission to board

~
i pet a dog and
i liked it he was tall
no leaning over
~
balcony cardinal
girlfriend flew up to meet him
he fed her by beak.
~
if the dolphin feel
like coming to the boat
they have permission.
~

while in the restroom
her husband bought a car
couple were engaged

~
fighting for land
haven’t “come a long way baby”
five thousand years
~
“don’t go in seven feet
mama knows CPR
but she can’t swim”.
~
kuthrapoly,
poly sci,polly want a cracker,
polygamy

~
ducks politely surround
until bread goes
inside their mouths.

~
“feel free to do
other things while you wait”
thank-you computer.
~
mom says stop kicking
dad says leave here alone
just having fun
~
how old is too old
to cry because you don’t
want to go home.

~
“why would i bring
your sunglasses” maybe because
you love your husband.
~

all about ducks

`
“raised by a dog”

Felip duck
jumps on hind legs
for french bread.
.

i name him
so i get to keep him
duck napping napper.

.

don’t crowd me
plenty of dough for you
keep your cool.
.

i’m surrounded
it’s a hold up at the
o k corral.
.

we do shots
of lemongrass before dinner
Felip and moi.

~
~

ducks adore
vinegar potato chips
gave them mine.

~

time to fly south
ask you to tag along
not a bad idea

~

bitterben calls
silly duck my follower
they can’t read.
~

man said “duck
is following you home”
going wrong way.

quack quack quack ack ack

pond traffic jam

someone stopped suddenly

duck built in horn.

`

The sign says:

water leaking

ocean closed for repairs

come back tomorrow.

`

“Signs” Tesla

“the sign says
long hair freaky people
do this don’t do that”

`
also:

you can’t swim
when there is no water
in water pipes.

it’s a rule
man said you can go in now
i don’t want to.

what are you saying
people were in pool before
we both laughed.

“some yahoo used
the wrong pipe six feet under”
man on cell phone.

best of all moves or can’t type in bed

lived in the same house , until 1997. cannot even count how many times,since 2004 i have moved. yesterday was the best,of the worst.housekeeping was supposed to come at 10 am , move the refrigerator to find my mother’s pearl ring.no one came: at 11;30 i left. came back at 12;30 .no one on any floor. i moved away but very close.the door would not open. after the key turned fingers red a security guard opened door,said i should get security here to make me key cards.no one wants to or knows who will….so i left the door unlocked with jewelry and everything inside.
one of my suitcases is missing. if it had scarves i spent 1000’s of hours making, that’s not good.
at least i don’t have 50 boxes of my mother’s crystal to worry movers will break this time. being charged 500.00 a month by movers in maryland for that and 4200.00 for their pretend packing, when i had packed everything myself.
the wireless will not work. the vacation rental said she will email as soon as they find the ring.
27 hours later, still no wireless.the extension cords don’t fit , new battery. fire shot out of every outlet and it’s happening here too. wireless fixer , not related to olivia pope, said you hardly ever see that. he said i will come back tonight or anytime and fixed it for a few minutes, but nothing he tried really worked. now i think plastic is burning.apparently computers need to be flat, not fluffed up on pillows.

.can’t type in the bed.can’t see the tv . can’t move it.it’s attached to the dresser.there are no cabinets in the kitchen.you have to be 6 feet tall or have a 47 inch sleeve length to reach the disposal switch. the dishwasher door falls on you. everything is on the right , that i need on the left.

but i love the walls, lcd tv’s,ocean 50 yards away,on the 50 yard line of the pool,the jacuzzi is next door and best of all no one running on the ceiling .yes i would stay here for the pretty swirly walls .no 500.00 condo fees.700.00 a month including electricity ,wireless,24 hr security,5 pools, tennis, putting greens,ducks, goldfish , creek, cable,ocean, beautiful blue delicious looking crabs,conch shells, jellyfish that don’t sting ,baby turtles, 10 baby ducks, carp ….. d.c. area was 2100.00 for 1 bedroom and 300.00 for electricity, cable and wireless and they have no ocean.