man without a country

sweet weather channel
every time it rains inside
every twelve seconds

just like last monday
another piece slips away
you did it again

saturday forecast
will never understand you
could have reached blue sea

dummy sitting here
shopping silicone lining
royal blue cookie sheets

amazon bakeware
hurricane winter pastry
emergency cakes

first task check weather
as a good little girl should
you’re not fooling me

high sixty seven
you say this at eleven
two p m is high

so why at five uhr
on the ten day forecast page
was SEVENTY THREE

at twelve twenty five
I could have gonE TO The BEACH
people shout haiku

four long months inside
aggravated by movers
every single day

moving in the snow
hurricane when i moved in
weather just hates me

in seven short days
buying vacation condo
renting to tourists

i’m glad i didn’t
waste time hiring a
management company

five minutes ago
realized i have to live there
molding glass ceiling

how can it not be
rained in all of december
raccoons keep tearing

it’s raining right now
have not thought about packing
can’t do that again

can you tell me why
d j ‘s play sad music
foggy and rainy out

PLAY BOOGIE FEVER
don’t play LIES OF HANDSOME MEN
need Brubeck’s take five

the sun just came out
heard that song for a year already
that’s enough

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your fix ,haiku tv six best picks

you should never go
on vacation because something
bad will happen

Die Hard(s) (me)
`

“they were out of
sixteen milimeter so i
got you two eights”

Gracie Allen film for son
`

“i can’t be impossible”
“i exist” “you mean
i’m improbable”

Sheldon on Big Bang Theory
`

“‘Fishy Bass Film’ sea
it now on a Scale of one
to ten it’s a ten”

Dr. Katz
`

“no no you’re not
bothering us we’re just making
out bills and crying”

Bob Newhart to his reverend ,may be rerun
`

“you know it’s still
our anniversary i was
hoping you’d say that”

White Collar

`
“tell me that you don’t
spend more money on raymond’s
christmas gifts than mine”

Robert Barone

`
“parents don’t fight much
in front of me and wally”
“read a book it’s bad”

Beaver Cleaver
`

“don’t worry bout me
pretty fly for a white guy
i drive a golf cart”

Larry Bird The Neighbors
___

“white boy steal the blues
just wake up in the morning
in the British Isles

down in Dixieland
since the white boy stole the blues
heard the latest”

Mose Allison “Middle Class White Boy”

calgon, mr bubble, ivory snow take me away

a small interruption in summer, brought to you by dove & murphy’s law. yesterday, i find it hard to sleep , because latin pop music was coming from the living room. someone has stolen my jazz station.
a normal, average day ,not unlike any other ,since the 8th of december, 1999, hanukkah. normal as in murphy’s law.
fourteen months of peaceful jazz to sleep with…who changed channel 36 to 45 & now it says no signal?
no time for that now.what the devil is wrong with my arm.oh ringworm how nice. bosco, ottie, gracie …they blame dogs?

you have to read this funny.once a dr , an osteopath or something told me i had feline leukemia. i laughed , but it was the only time in my life i had a cat. (he didn’t know anastasia was living under my house, so i put her on the screened in porch & fed her every day.when she became pregnant this cat person told me we should put her in the warm garage .when we found no kittens, we took anastasia to the vet, who laughed because anastasia was a boy the entire time). doctor or whoever you were ,don’t you think i have enough diseases without this feline thingy…
so we have a dog a cat & there was the deer who apparently gave me lyme disease when i was 7 but i don’t find out until it’s too late ,resistant in 2011 & the mosquitoes dr. cheney & NIH blame for CFIDS in st. thomas in 1983.

so,it was supposed to be the last warm day,however the wind is a warm 17 mph without gusts & the weather channel is only 10 degrees off guessing. at 11 a m it begins pouring like a hurricane & last night i find a very wet ceiling , after bossy fixed the roof.you would think the worst thing today would be knowing you can’t go outside for 4 months, but now ceiling can turn to mold .

i already needed a tranquilizer to be aggravated by the new moving company,after spending months with mary & before mary ,they gave me paige…eighteen email with mary about complications.can anyone dust.i left 9 years ago….don’t bring the tv it weighs 400 pounds & takes 4 people to lift.it got wet in the moving truck during a hurricane in 99……but that’s another story…after 2 months, something happened to mary & now stepford wives keep answering my questions as hi new person we will be glad to give you an estimate.. hello mary did that a long time ago.we are way past that……..two months wasted.

then ,what appears in the kitchen ,ants.i want to say i can’t believe this, but yes of course,my life has been a soap opera since i was eighteen , who am i kidding 14 years, 24/7 but really ,since one week ,after 12th grade.
i have an entire story about ants, i want to say october the 20th..i know now how & why the ants appear.

then i write my brother about signing contract .how can that be anything but tension.while b/p is already jumping out of your chest,let’s write a new moving co., storage co…

i wish mc donald’s would say you deserve a break , but no, so i apparently didn’t have enough on what’s left of my brain & tell my realtor ,sure yall come on over tomorrow & we’ll make an offer on a condo.

it’s tomorrow ,so at 9:49 a m & bossy decides to try breaking in & spray pesticide… 2 simple words no chemicals…
the owner & i had an agreement i can only move in if no pesticide… exterminators put key in door every 2 months,9 a m / nightgown & say we will write it down , but bossy said it’s up to him…this is like the 7th time…there would be no ants,except for the m&m fiasco, but i spray tobasco sauce.fourteen months of bossy literally breaking in the other condo.i’m asleep . then he pretended the a c leaked instead of the roof, causing me to leave for days .. then he said he fixed the roof , but obviously not.

technically he is breaking in , but mentally he truly broke in last september & scared me half to death, when i had just really had 5 people break in , in maryland & really had ptsd. murphy wouldn’t let him him break in , if i wasn’t already afraid of this.

then i go to universal orlando where police try to come in at 4 am also & how does a person who is ill from toxic molds have mold appear in every darn state they go to get away from it?
dr . says go to a new building,then 4 years later there’s toxic mold in maryland. florida it wasn’t toxic that i know, but mold…..myrtle beach – both condos.

oh and when i tried to leave my house in charleston, after racoons broke in , 2007, & after i fell down the stairs ,5000.00 /hospital, i was going back to virginia & the hotel i stay at had person after person reviewing that the hotel as having mold.i was going to rent a new apartment ,they built outside my bedroom & the lease said if you find mold & that’s when i threw it out the window.

cab drivers who took me to the dr every other day for 5 years told me about this woman who got sick from toxic mold ,like me ,at the hilton,across the street who got millions & all i got was 14 years of aggravation ,2640.00 a month health insurance & lawyers who said too complicated or they don’t know how & the statute of limitations ran out, when my real estate lawyer said she would have helped me.

so boss thinks it’s up to him. the very best thing that could happen would be choking & an asthma attack & then hospital.worst would be death.i am already about to throw him out the window for the sawdust in my lungs & waking at 8 am , 6 days a week,for 4 weeks.there are 4 people here & 80 condos, but he picks the ill person’s bedroom window & door to saw boards in front of….who else murphy? a very long 24 hours…

haiku tv

why is henry VIII
a tudor for goodness sake
playing a vampire?
`
“don’t wake the sick
unless you forgot to take out
the thermometer”

Everybody Loves Ray
`
“i mean even alice
in wonderland has got
to wake up sometime”

Gidget
`
“think you can handle
another round , you better
eat your spinach”

Tom Selleck /Blue Bloods
`
“the lonliest monk
do you happen to mean
thelonious monk?

Hello Ladies/ name three jazz musicians
`
‘can’t tell me you don’t
do it to elizabeth
the pointy finger”

White Collar
`
” if you have any
desire to be back with him
don’t wait too long”
“longer you stay dark
harder it is to come back”
being live person

Covert Affairs
`
“do we have to get
those pills where they sit in
bathtubs in the field”

Raising Hope
`
“carry a saw in
your pocket, is that what you
said when you met mom”

Bob’s Burgers
`
“the roses are for
my girlfriend the chrysanthemums
are for my wife”

Who said this?
`
“for g-d’s sake a haiku is only 17 syllables & it doesn’t
even have to make sense”
The Millers

not a haiku they
couldn’t even think of one
if it’s so simple?
moi
`

summer with J

as far as you can
see hundreds on sand waiting
for citizenship

what country please
we swam a very long way
eye of the storm

jellies everywhere
translucent hot pink ribbons
each different motif

one tiny bubble
shaped like baby octopus
totally clear

giant pink hearts
sporting two long tentacles
twelve inches long

circular brown
triangular his outer
different from others

floating butterfly
saltwater in your veins
one in every crowd

finally got it up
troubles with his blue kite
flying in the sky
`
” Bodies in the sand
to get away from it all = beach boys / kokomo
where we wanna go ”

thirsty bluebird swim with me

blackbird on dish
giving a piece of his mind
sounds like morse code.
`
bluebird lands on rope
takes six sips of chlorine
i say nooo each time

you have a shower
sprinklers puddles and spicket
why must you do this.
`
I’m a little Blackbird looking for a Bluebird

“Never had no happiness
no fun caress all over
east to west ”

” Blue as anyone
can be clouds all i ever
see sun forsakes ”

`

postliminary
bluebird sipping cement pond
can’t be the same one

born to be alive
his fat head under each time
he’s hard of tasting

same satellite dish
you are the same silly bird
loves radiation.
`
Radioactive

” the apocalypse
oh i’m radioactive
feel it in my bones ”

haiku, sea ku

no such thing as a
gefilte fish it’s carp white
fish or whatever.
.
Squeaky Clean

it’s coming from
outside the house note on door
i’m in the shower

note has been on door
since tuesday it’s thursday now
what a dumb pumpkin.
.
if i was a ferret
would have died twelve times
last thirteen years.
.
october fishermen
like to tap my head daily
with red test line .
.

ten pink jellyfish
that’s how far i walked not
very far at all.
.
annie and moon pie
two king charles spaniel puppies
stop me coming back.
.
seventeen jellies
little did i know friday
there would be hundreds.
.
we are like two ships
colliding in the night
stuck together.
.
amazing jet ski
dolphin tours do you watch them
or do they watch you ?
.
“daddy can i take
a hot shower no you can
take an ice cold one”.

`
I Saw Stars
Etta Jones

” i heard a birdie
sing so sweet so sweet the
moment i fell for you ” …
.
Cold as Ice

“you’re as cold as ice
someday you’ll pay the price i
know want paradise ” …