are you home conch ku

conch shells everywhere
one belongs ancient egypt
genie sculptured

alluring tiny
seashells purple figurines
pink gray black carvings

black conch so heavy
someone must be home inside
back bluest ocean

abort teensy scream
man saying another
animal attached

liquid ink spraying
wouldn’t hurt you little one
deepen inside sand

had he been a skunk
inquiring if anyone
has a V8

undulating dolphin siesta

still afternoon waves
can barely hear sound of sea
bluest unmoving

a perfect ocean
beautiful quiet colors
no drop will splash

what makes you so smooth
sunny seas crystallized blues
calm your heart your soul

no fish man or tail
asleep deep water’s blanket
whales playng opossum.

flounder floundering III

your mouth wide open
walk all the way to the beach
no bridge over creek

ten feet are stolen
fall through into the water
man says four days tops

only at low tide
can walk all the way around
amazing maze

halloween low tide
purple crabs scurry to holes
untouched shells

i will stay feed you
you never turn down sunbeam
we will eat all day.
`
mr mullet voice
“make the hotel next door take
you home in their cart”

was almost high tide
second bridge comes into view
gate being lifted

back to the fish tail
dolphin playing shark story
crystal blue water

mr mullet speaks
“i will do anything once
but never again”

two girls found a shark
i’m sure the witches had
visions of necklaces

had to wash off red
he missed dancing with dolphins
teach him not to kill

honeymoon tail
he fell asleep in the gulf stream
fishing for marlin

halfed a dramamine
after groom’s tummy ache
10 foot swells

hurricane coming
no one told me mile below
i caught a tuna

grab the seat in front
every time your head would fall
fear ocean slumber

flounder and floundering

Mr. Mullet

blues left canada
what? it’s cold in canada!
no left the COUNTY
.
we’ll have reese’s tomorrow
peanut butter cups?
no we’ll have RACES.
_

Halloween Jellyfish

mushroom jellyfish
brown stem also lobster claws
filling station flags
.
firmly planted in ground
spaceship bubble take off
jelly to NASA
.
are we clear lift off
you’re clear pink thin onion ring
negative take off .
_

woman holding rod
tentacles on her black cap
black skirt bikini
.
forgot halloween
mr. mullet told me crazy
giant spider .
_
grandma caught flounder
mr. mullet’s wife’s mother
sitting position.
.
(can’t read my haiku
hard to write in the ocean
there are no tables)
.
grandma was so proud
showing flounder in bucket
both alive kicking
.
grandma and flounder
told her i’ll see you next year
if we both make it
.
those were her words
i was thinking the same thing
hope she brings reese’s.

part I

haiku appear out of thin air

it’s a joke to me
because i don’t have much
oxygen in my brain.

i have hundreds of haiku ;enough to last until next summer, but not a lot of time.

haiku appear from
nowhere but questions for movers
take too much thought.

i started this in florida to write about criminal companies, but i had to wait until the criminals were finished, so instead i wrote about the crime in orlando. then i was sidetracked by haiku month last february.

last week a woman who retired from the legislature in n.j. moved here full time, to her home of 30 years.she never wants to leave..she also was in florida , 30 minutes from me & cried every day.florida will do that to you.she gave her son money for child care & came here with her husband.. even their 14 year old dog bosco got ill from depression in florida….that’s what his vet said.why not a dog.last week i saw a horse, who was depressed on andy griffith, when his father went on vacation.

florida should be the state that makes you cry,or universal orlando…i cry because there is no pizza hut there to deliver.why do i keep moving to places with no pizza hut delivery…potomac maryland- no pizza hut & now myrtle beach in this zip code either.the last time i had a veggie lover’s was 2004 at my house in charleston.
why am i thinking of pizza, because yesterday some criminal searched the best time to deliver pizza flyers & found me here.

only a criminal would do that, b/c it is illegal.they are asking the best time to commit a crime.the only way to put the pizza mafia out of business is if everyone calls the phone number on the flyer over & over so no one can order pizza & i don’t think that will work…they will just keep going to jail & hiring people who make bail & making pizza in bathtubs or just stealing your credit card number when you call for a nonexistent pizza.

last week i started to write a long story about stupid people asking me the same question over & over for 2 years, & instead of punching them ,saying you can go read my answer here.it isn’t anyone at wordpress, but i decided not to, because if you don’t have enough time to read people you follow, you shouldn’t write.and i am busy thinking up questions for movers..

it takes me six days to think of each question.i only have five now.they aren’t simple. they are very strange questions, because no one has been in this situation before.
how do you move to a city that only has furnished condos & get your things from 2 other states & 2 other condos & you have to use 2 different movers . you have no choice.

one of these companies who you didn’t hire came into your home and took everything you own while you were at the hospital .some day i will write stories about them.

they pretended to pack the entire place that i had spent 2 months packing & i have 11 witnesses & charged me 4700.00 to go 10 minutes away.. the same exact things allied had charged me only 1800.00 to move to maryland from s.c. that i had packed.
just now i found a mover who will go the same distance estimates 793.00. they really have to pack this time though, because i left 9 years ago & i can’t go in the building with toxic mold.

last week someone said you have spent 12,000 storing your things for 2 years…i didn’t say no i spent 24,000 storing 2 homes, because don’t you think i know that.i’m not bitter ben i can do math..why do you think i can’t sleep…700.00 for a condo & 1000.00 to store everything you own.obviously my things are very important & the next person who says something is leaving through the window & then i will be on law & order in jail.so do me a favor & don’t ask any more stupid questions.

why don’t i go into your home & take everything you own away from you,all your pictures of your parents, your dog who was your life, your clothes, your 80 black dresses , all the wedding presents your dead relatives gave you, all the needlepoint & knitting your mother made in her life, the 300 scarves you made, rugs you made, needlepoint picctures, your pillows it hurts your neck to sleep without & you can’t find comfortable ones anywhere, your prescriptions for 3 months , that’s only 6000.00, 16 bottles of supplemants the dr just gave you, you can’t just get at the store……………..the real list is much better, but i am trying to not remember
what they really have, or i will never sleep & the crazy guys who stole the floor outside my bedroom so i am trapped since sunday on the fourth floor again ,with the saw buzzing , cutting wood to make new floors at 8 am every day.
tomorrow if they aren’t finished , i will cut a hole in the balcony screen & climb the tree & play with the 3 raccoons i see, who really shouldn’t be there: then we will go to the beach, b/c it’s 73 tomorrow and all of the conch shells will be for us.

they just love to waste money here building .last week they decided to build a new sidewalk all the way to the highway. nothing was wrong with the old one.for some reason this means you have to lock my lunch, clothes ,haiku & shoes in the beach pool & say they told you to lock the beach, which is nowhere near the sidewalk. but that’s not as bad as the 2 people the security guard locked in the pool.maybe next time he will look.it was alright , i had crackers on my towel at the beach.no it wasn’t when i went back, jonathan livingston seagull & 30 of his closest friends had pecked the crackers open. they even opened the bag of shells & threw them around.

thirsty bluebird swim with me

blackbird on dish
giving a piece of his mind
sounds like morse code.
`
bluebird lands on rope
takes six sips of chlorine
i say nooo each time

you have a shower
sprinklers puddles and spicket
why must you do this.
`
I’m a little Blackbird looking for a Bluebird

“Never had no happiness
no fun caress all over
east to west ”

” Blue as anyone
can be clouds all i ever
see sun forsakes ”

`

postliminary
bluebird sipping cement pond
can’t be the same one

born to be alive
his fat head under each time
he’s hard of tasting

same satellite dish
you are the same silly bird
loves radiation.
`
Radioactive

” the apocalypse
oh i’m radioactive
feel it in my bones ”

bridge over the ocean’s creek

cheerleading camp
band formation schools of fish
choreography
.
practicing flashes
who’s on top who pays under
pyramid schemes
.
leader starts cheer
promising fish free dinner
making a straight line
.
they go left then right
never getting anywhere
form circle of trust
.
no such pyramid
leader will lose his life
larger shark waiting
`
Thrift Shop
Macklemore :

” twenty dollars in
my pocket ” “a cold ass
honkey ” “this is awesome ”

” i call that getting
swindled and pimped
those flannel zebra jammies “

haiku, sea ku

no such thing as a
gefilte fish it’s carp white
fish or whatever.
.
Squeaky Clean

it’s coming from
outside the house note on door
i’m in the shower

note has been on door
since tuesday it’s thursday now
what a dumb pumpkin.
.
if i was a ferret
would have died twelve times
last thirteen years.
.
october fishermen
like to tap my head daily
with red test line .
.

ten pink jellyfish
that’s how far i walked not
very far at all.
.
annie and moon pie
two king charles spaniel puppies
stop me coming back.
.
seventeen jellies
little did i know friday
there would be hundreds.
.
we are like two ships
colliding in the night
stuck together.
.
amazing jet ski
dolphin tours do you watch them
or do they watch you ?
.
“daddy can i take
a hot shower no you can
take an ice cold one”.

`
I Saw Stars
Etta Jones

” i heard a birdie
sing so sweet so sweet the
moment i fell for you ” …
.
Cold as Ice

“you’re as cold as ice
someday you’ll pay the price i
know want paradise ” …

permission to board

~
i pet a dog and
i liked it he was tall
no leaning over
~
balcony cardinal
girlfriend flew up to meet him
he fed her by beak.
~
if the dolphin feel
like coming to the boat
they have permission.
~

while in the restroom
her husband bought a car
couple were engaged

~
fighting for land
haven’t “come a long way baby”
five thousand years
~
“don’t go in seven feet
mama knows CPR
but she can’t swim”.
~
kuthrapoly,
poly sci,polly want a cracker,
polygamy

~
ducks politely surround
until bread goes
inside their mouths.

~
“feel free to do
other things while you wait”
thank-you computer.
~
mom says stop kicking
dad says leave here alone
just having fun
~
how old is too old
to cry because you don’t
want to go home.

~
“why would i bring
your sunglasses” maybe because
you love your husband.
~