duck duck duck seagull

pierre stands behind
to the right favorite spot
two inches behind

how do you know him
because all ducks look alike
he will push your knee

game that children play
taking bread from my fingers
every other duck

saltwater swimming
paddling their feet while eating
suddenly seagulls

crash landing flapping
scare everyone taking bread
away darling ducks

motionless afraid
ducks pretend they are statues
looking for hitchcock

i am so afraid
of him even though i’ve never
seen his movies

i imagine this
ducks are imagining too
unfriendly seagulls

no they aren’t imagining
ducks experiencing
seagulls pecking


john writes friends at work
december i’m at the beach
seventy seven

of course jealousy
then everyone grows colder
i explain the wind

13 m.p.h.
ten day forecast is shocking
checks out on their phones

have i turned into
weather channel ask bitter ben
he will tell you

why do we yell fore
golf course hit on the noggin
look ahead beware

haiku appear out of thin air

it’s a joke to me
because i don’t have much
oxygen in my brain.

i have hundreds of haiku ;enough to last until next summer, but not a lot of time.

haiku appear from
nowhere but questions for movers
take too much thought.

i started this in florida to write about criminal companies, but i had to wait until the criminals were finished, so instead i wrote about the crime in orlando. then i was sidetracked by haiku month last february.

last week a woman who retired from the legislature in n.j. moved here full time, to her home of 30 years.she never wants to leave..she also was in florida , 30 minutes from me & cried every day.florida will do that to you.she gave her son money for child care & came here with her husband.. even their 14 year old dog bosco got ill from depression in florida….that’s what his vet said.why not a dog.last week i saw a horse, who was depressed on andy griffith, when his father went on vacation.

florida should be the state that makes you cry,or universal orlando…i cry because there is no pizza hut there to deliver.why do i keep moving to places with no pizza hut delivery…potomac maryland- no pizza hut & now myrtle beach in this zip code either.the last time i had a veggie lover’s was 2004 at my house in charleston.
why am i thinking of pizza, because yesterday some criminal searched the best time to deliver pizza flyers & found me here.

only a criminal would do that, b/c it is illegal.they are asking the best time to commit a crime.the only way to put the pizza mafia out of business is if everyone calls the phone number on the flyer over & over so no one can order pizza & i don’t think that will work…they will just keep going to jail & hiring people who make bail & making pizza in bathtubs or just stealing your credit card number when you call for a nonexistent pizza.

last week i started to write a long story about stupid people asking me the same question over & over for 2 years, & instead of punching them ,saying you can go read my answer here.it isn’t anyone at wordpress, but i decided not to, because if you don’t have enough time to read people you follow, you shouldn’t write.and i am busy thinking up questions for movers..

it takes me six days to think of each question.i only have five now.they aren’t simple. they are very strange questions, because no one has been in this situation before.
how do you move to a city that only has furnished condos & get your things from 2 other states & 2 other condos & you have to use 2 different movers . you have no choice.

one of these companies who you didn’t hire came into your home and took everything you own while you were at the hospital .some day i will write stories about them.

they pretended to pack the entire place that i had spent 2 months packing & i have 11 witnesses & charged me 4700.00 to go 10 minutes away.. the same exact things allied had charged me only 1800.00 to move to maryland from s.c. that i had packed.
just now i found a mover who will go the same distance estimates 793.00. they really have to pack this time though, because i left 9 years ago & i can’t go in the building with toxic mold.

last week someone said you have spent 12,000 storing your things for 2 years…i didn’t say no i spent 24,000 storing 2 homes, because don’t you think i know that.i’m not bitter ben i can do math..why do you think i can’t sleep…700.00 for a condo & 1000.00 to store everything you own.obviously my things are very important & the next person who says something is leaving through the window & then i will be on law & order in jail.so do me a favor & don’t ask any more stupid questions.

why don’t i go into your home & take everything you own away from you,all your pictures of your parents, your dog who was your life, your clothes, your 80 black dresses , all the wedding presents your dead relatives gave you, all the needlepoint & knitting your mother made in her life, the 300 scarves you made, rugs you made, needlepoint picctures, your pillows it hurts your neck to sleep without & you can’t find comfortable ones anywhere, your prescriptions for 3 months , that’s only 6000.00, 16 bottles of supplemants the dr just gave you, you can’t just get at the store……………..the real list is much better, but i am trying to not remember
what they really have, or i will never sleep & the crazy guys who stole the floor outside my bedroom so i am trapped since sunday on the fourth floor again ,with the saw buzzing , cutting wood to make new floors at 8 am every day.
tomorrow if they aren’t finished , i will cut a hole in the balcony screen & climb the tree & play with the 3 raccoons i see, who really shouldn’t be there: then we will go to the beach, b/c it’s 73 tomorrow and all of the conch shells will be for us.

they just love to waste money here building .last week they decided to build a new sidewalk all the way to the highway. nothing was wrong with the old one.for some reason this means you have to lock my lunch, clothes ,haiku & shoes in the beach pool & say they told you to lock the beach, which is nowhere near the sidewalk. but that’s not as bad as the 2 people the security guard locked in the pool.maybe next time he will look.it was alright , i had crackers on my towel at the beach.no it wasn’t when i went back, jonathan livingston seagull & 30 of his closest friends had pecked the crackers open. they even opened the bag of shells & threw them around.

it happened today

lying on deck
six little birdies chirping
know i’m here right?

four inches away
chirping loudly at crumbs
i ask for a dress.

they disappeared
after saying this isn’t
the flintstones silly.
`
`
Swaying From Palm
Brushing Against Fluffy Cloud
One With Universe.

Seagulls Fly Nines
Lucky Number Seven
On his Way To Vegas
`
`

woman in surf
“has a sand dollar inside”
it’s a jellyfish.

she laughed and said
“it shakes like my belly
belly is jelly”.

when i walk back
she and husband say he just
got up swam away.

the best part
she asked me if it turns
into a sand dollar.

now i’m wondering
actually look up question
you know the answer.

`
“country girl” luke bryan

“shake it for catfish
swimming down deep in the creek
shake it for me”.