baking dozen thirteen

“when you’re fourteen
the world is a very confusing
and sexy place”

Ray Barone to his mother
`

“i’m a bad father
like ernest hemingway or
some other writer”

Peter Griffin / Family Guy
`

“george always says that
one woman like me is enough
for any man”

Gracie
`

“just so the ice cream
doesn’t go to waste i think
you better eat it”

Ward Cleaver to Beaver
`

“you’re all a bunch of
pigs i smell bacon this whole
place reeks of bacon”

“and guess what I’m
going kosher cause jerkey don’t
dig on swine wo oo”

Brooklyn 9-9
`

“if i’m gonna be
a donor i’d rather give
it to the red cross”

mosquitoes / Petticoat Junction
`

“when i go to heaven
will i be anatomically
correct”

Raising Hope
`

“you need to take a
step closer to the world
we are living in ”

About A Boy
`

“I’ve looked into the
eyes of traitors before casey
you’re no traitor”

Person Of Interest
`

“look my contempt is
not with the U S it’s always
been with Russia”

The Blacklist
`

“soon you’ll grow into
your grandfather’s shoes
you can be dangerous too”

Maude
`

“if you’re ever in
Japan look me up we’ll take
a bath together”
`

Bob Newhart

dine with haiku television nine

Gracie said she can’t
“have oysters at lunch because
there’s no R in it”

George & Gracie
`
(my brother’s best friend
Elliott Gould’s attorney
until his murder)

“now do you just want
to do it like this with no
feeling on my part”

Bob & Carol Ted & Alice
Dyan Cannon to Elliot Gould
`

“if anyone should
spend a night in teen ranger jail
it should be me”

Bob’s Burgers
`

“i will be writing
an order of protection
after this meeting”

The Good Wife
`
“this is going to
happen and there’s nothing you
can do about it”

General Hospital
`

“and the fact that you’re
unhappy proves that you are
not selfish at all”

The Middle
`

“i know we used to
dance together all the time”
“way to kill moment”

About A Boy
`

“come here kiss me Tim
or whatever your name is”
“there will be nightmares”

The Blacklist
`