pool hop shark haiku

jazz white bikini
after only ten minutes
rain drops touching face

lasting minuet
balcony reconnaissance
only man and beer

no one is smoking
in the pool just right outside
so close if it rains

you begin choking
just inhaling inhaler
our government banned

are you alright dear
it’s the charcoal smoke blowing
missing golf cart twice

standing inside pool
smoking three long cigarettes
a man at the beach

trying the best pool
no one is allowed to smoke
walk inside there’s smoke

no one is smoking
the pool or the jacuzzi
or standing around

most of the people
looking for shark in the bay
standing on the bridge

no less than a week
“there are no sharks in the bay”
he told his two sons

“the shark has escaped”
while i am writing they shout
and now back to two

found the dumb smokers
blowing smoke inside the pool
sitting at the door

don’t know where to go
what will become of me now
third attack this hour

two police cars sit
they wanted to see the shark
walk over the bridge

two weeks end tonight
our favorite family
“who will never smoke”

the man doesn’t know
there could be sharks in the bay
some call it a creek


mr. shirt inc. a haiku

in her blue wagon
she waves like a beauty queen
sideways, two years old

practice for peach bowl
waving to subjects from float
wave back side to side

boxer admires
pink azaleas and roses
cart interrupted

she found her G string
apparently buying new
when i was little

all i had to do
walking a few doors away
my father’s shirt store

mr. shirt outlet
little miss shirt buys a string
for her violin

rosin from Pecknel
and if you wanted new shoes
godmother’s shoe store

dancing school twelve years
Lake Forest Shopping Center
anything you want

ice cream or sandwich
and Little Pig’s Barbecue
Pasquele’s pizza

aunt ida sold clothes
miss australia would help you
truly won the crown

the only bad part
going to get cigarettes
for my godmother

i am probably
the only person who bought
cigarettes at eight

and did not smoke them
the man knew who they were for
still should not allow

of course my aunt died
the day before my wedding
cigarettes, cancer

a good day for smoke
blowing straight up to the sky
hamburgers , hot dogs


on a clear day , you can see tattoos forever haiku

distraction from kites
works of art without canvas
the tattoos today

answer menza menz
but only with your left hand
the non verbal way

ten hours later
gumba teaching menza menz
speaking italian

you just now realize
speaking to italian friend
such a silly goose

wasn’t on purpose
probably laughing at me
knowing half and half

lifeguard sounds his horn
shark jellyfish out too far
your guess is as good

and stupid still here
cigarette in her left hand
hot dog in her right

“only one jesus”
relative of the waltons
that is what she said

parasailing pair
four men in tan shirts leaning
long boardwalk next door

long sleeved quadruplets
an interesting commercial
maybe a wedding


the stupids: a coastal not coast clear haiku

thirty minute wait
white golf cart disappearing
but where does it go

after the third time
realized silly’s stopping short
real estate office

chef’s carriage stops twice
he’s already mad at her
talking on the phone

now all chairs are full
take five, freeing a table
an interruption

“so how’s your new place
like it better than the lodge
that’s what i’m saying”

interrupt me please
anytime for a haiku
favorite neighbors

all of these people
i’m always the lucky one
man with cigarette

wind my only luck
really didn’t have to run
asthma from jumping

then a dumb lady
asks if she can sit with me
NO she just sits down

grabs a cigarette
and asks can you smoke up here
i shake my head no

with lighter in hand
telling me she probably
shouldn’t smoke either

she heard me coughing
eyes glued to her mean lighter
running far away

was trying to write
about lifeguard blast and shark
she would not allow

insane chattering
her sister and granddaughter
take over table

steals her grandchild’s fries
yells at her for no reason
threatens to hit her

“i will throw this
water bottle at you right now
if you don’t do this ”

she only got worse
thinking that the coast was clear
eating a hot dog

Looney still had cigarette
hand under table

(next new prison book:
‘She Pulled Out A Cigarette
And I Shot Her Dead)’

think before you smoke
make sure no one is around
bullet with your name

just arrived paradise,almost left hard way


“i haven’t done
anything yet and it’s already
awesome” daddy

please do not reserve
south pool chairs with your towel
they will be removed

and then what happens
when you give towels back
you find who guilty are

how embarrassing
lady in powder room tells me
have a nice trip

where am i going
do i have too many bags
i’m already here

“you can either
sit here with us or wear this
and go in the water”

he’s sitting here with us
“nothing to eat today”
“three bowls cereal”

isn’t that something
apparently cereal
isn’t really food

black cowboy boots
blue swim trunks and blue t shirt
will have funny tan lines

had to run away
why do idiots think it’s
alright to smoke here

can’t they sit
in their stupid chair normal people
it doesn’t bother

if only looks could kill
like my chiropractor’s wife
she has the best

the third time
he ran over here he put it out
perfecting my look

straw or cigarette
a game i must play too often
not a fun game

masochist woman
tattoos everywhere bikini
does not cover

ringo’s sister
her hair was bright red last year
for some reason black now

idiot round four
this may be the last haiku
giving him the pool

perhaps choke to death
and my poem blew away when
i threw it and ran

tell’s me it’s alright
idiot facing ocean
and i behind him

what the heck way
do you think the wind is blowing
open your eyes man

you moved from two feet
on my left to two feet on my right
no difference

“it’s getting hot in here
so take off all your clothes”
don’t think that will help


music soothes his soul


wrestler with tattoo
when he pulled stick from mouth
was so very happy

preparing to run
instead yellow lollipop
wasn’t cigarette

breath giving duck pond
finest wind you’ll ever meet
never lets you down

bobble head my friend
“hot stuff baby this evenin”
appearing all year

bird landed beside
he didn’t even frighten
they are true friends now

thrash flies away
lizard comes to show us dancing
floor show you can’t miss

ducks live
where tropical winds delight
every fiber of your being

who invented this
greatest architect on earth
between the towers

saltwater fish duck
when bread crumbs fly overhead
ducklings with mothers

tram drives by ducklings
“it’s a small world after all”
like you’re at disney

people think i’m here
for their entertainment
but there’s no cover charge

talk to you constantly
so you cannot write
make you forget haiku


Duckie Bad Hair Day


feathers in the grass
cool wind is blowing hard
ducks lost their attire

forgotten cheez its
another flaw in their day
along with bad hair

hope you grow back fast
or you will need to become
coppertone duckies

in his mouth a rod
he holds this like a cigar
tragic beating heart

why is he chewing
now his wife has one too
oh heavenly pretzel

you fooled this fools eyes
also her heart of drumbeats
summon peaceful sea

tranquil quiet winds
listen to frolicking waves
symphony of seas


There’s No Crying In Beach Ball


volley or soccer
attacked from behind
ball landed against my shin

after saying dam_
wondered why me of seventy
what are the odds

this is much later
two love birds bickering
calling each other names

“don’t interrupt game
in other words just stand there
and don’t say nothin”

he asked me if i
was catching a cold from the
air conditioning

yes fifteen years ago
i caught a cold from the
air conditioning

“music and passion
always the fashion
at the copacabana”

now that’s a beach song
two years have never heard this
at the cabanas

blue white sheikhs inside
six thousand dollars a week
for the cabanas

twenty something people
trying to decide what
to do for dinner

“last chance for romance”
actually last chance to breathe
cigarette left field

kids could hit you
with ten balls wouldn’t hurt
bad as mother’s cigarette

i was thinking
“this could be heaven and this could be hell”
but it’s hell

two hours deciding
what to have for dinner
just go already

cigarettes not only choke
they make me grumpy
can tell by my poems

also they murder
your aunts and godmother
RJR cheats death row

have some cookies
with your cigarettes traitors


You’re My Lucky Star

it can’t be live from wales
my father’s favorite
tom jones in the flesh

golf cart chauffeur asks
are you going for the music
shake your head yes

but had no idea
another man peeking through fence
like my neighbor

who would promise
not to knock over water
if you get in pool

telling me about
his tennis villa and i
made an offer too

you have to like this
an anti-smoking neighbor
and jim walks over

extends his arm
“hi i’m jim and you were writing
poetry last year”

didn’t even tell
that man who asked if i was
“counting jellyfish”

three months ago
i expected someone to say
you were here last year

the moon must be full
lots of men flirting tonight
coughing with a mask

so ill i cannot
even walk without coughing
alaska can hear

tom jones singing
lyrical wonderful moonlight
best you’ll ever hear

Ringo’s peeking
under the chair tail calling
to come play with him now