haiku tv nineteen is gluten free

`
i just made biscuits
right then on law and order
his mother calls him

you biscuit eating
son of a you know what
and then he confesses

Goren thinks man
professional confessor
to get away from mom

“all he does all day
sit around eating biscuits”
mother to Isis

`
“beautiful woman
with a lot to offer
shall we make an offer”

Modern Family
`

“bless me father
for i have done nothing but watch
pornos” on tv

The Closer
`

“you can just imagine
you have a cowboy riding you
like a horse”

ETV Yoga
`

“can we go
to the concussion i think
i have a hospital”

Raising Hope
`

Smile

“not just because
of the tootsie roll we hide
in every pocket”

“congratulations
mikey you got yourself
one of those trophy wives”

Mike and Molly
`

seventeen, haiku tv, the funniest

.
“his christening
before they broke the champagne bottle
over his head”
Gracie’s Uncle Harvey

“i heard your mamma
rang a guy’s bells all the way
to heaven tonight”
Mike and Molly

“at your age
you shouldn’t look at furniture
unless it has a lid”
Frank Barone to Marie

“don’t use the woman
who’s sleeping with my girlfriend
to try to flip me”
The Good Wife

“really don’t like
how your wings poke me when we sleep
cause you’re an angel”
Big Bang Theory

“sixty percent
believe the noah’s ark story
is completely true”
Bill Maher /HBO

“stan’s cousin
the diabetic is visiting
from arizona”
Marie Barone

“the cow gives all the milk
but the bull gets the blue ribbon
a man’s world”
Gracie Allen

.

haiku tv sixteen

.
“you found jack (nothing)
the FBI found jack
I found him and his name IS Jack”

The Closer

“the voices in your head
are telling you you’re crazy
don’t believe them”

David Letterman

“i’m going to go
to the deli anyway
terry loves kreplach”

Terry on Brooklyn 9-9

“allergic to ducks
i won’t invite you to my
duck duck goose party”

Bob’s Burgers

“one for the lady
and one for the car ride
to pick up the lady”

box of chocolate / Mike and Molly

“i was curious
to know how glue tasted
like a horse lollipop”

Brooklyn 9-9

“sounds like somebody
was baptized in a river
of good good lovin”

Mike and Molly

“if you can’t afford
your medication astra
zenica will help”

Commercial

this has been driving me crazy for possibly 7 years, and not because it was a haiku and now it isn’t.”only my hairdresser knows for sure”. (just realized i could make my own commercial. only hairdresser knows for sure, when i got lyme disease, at age 7 ,in her woods , covering her driveway , behind liberty life insurance company and i had their health insurance, but i never found out,about the lyme, until 3 years ago).

back to astra zenica,when this commercial first came out, this is what they said.then 3 days later, i hear “may be able to help”& ever since….maybe their lawyers told them to change this, but i know when it first came on tv it was : will help.