“the problem is you’re two tents” haiku

`

pointing to two tents
tent poles of conversation
about the tent poles

” having a dinner
for people who do not clot
necrophiliacs”

so busy thinking
i’m not sure that’s the right word
you miss the haiku

suddenly laughter
one a m in the morning
word pops in your head

hemophiliac
remembering what she said
anastasia

her little brother
romanoff and baltimore
you can call me al

another driver
when they take the tent poles down
always remember

and then dr. katz
“i’m a pup tent i’m a teepee
i’m a pup tent”

so dr. katz said
“your problem is you’re two tents”
but really too tense

`

sumo mullet haiku

~

8/5

belly flop mullet
from two different directions
at least twelve inches

five at the same time
jumping into each other
right in front of you

thousands of mullet
never seeing fish so close
last week they were small

sumo chasing them
standing in a pool low tide
almost an hour

south to myrtle beach
except they jump from both sides
and a sideways wave

swim from the round pool
teeny mullet jumping high
twenty at a time

riding the wave tip
then they’re flying wallendas
big kahuna wave

when they flop back down
large fish make circular waves
just like a rain drop

eventually girls
oblivious to mullet
float behind the pool

father calls them back
drift toward north carolina
still not seeing fish

they walk back on land
going the wrong way too fast
very good idea

~

Dinner last night haiku

`

” to be defeated
opening can of tuna
would be terrible

that is why I like
preparing microwave meals
bip bop boom in bin

a few potatoes
a lot of mucking around
why the rich eat out

`
(And Then Breakfast)

big glossy effects
if you watch with the sound off
not much real substance”
(Blade Runner)

eight A M each day
essential leaf blower noise
isn’t essential

I am just waiting
for you to put sunscreen on
hand you can of beans

got rid of Bird Cage
Nicolas Cage is gone too
Bringing Out The Dead
(Amazon Prime Video Movies)

“they sneak apples in
why would anyone want this
maybe meat lovers”
(Quorn Veggie Sausages)

`

siberian husky loves jazz too II haiku

`

fly me to the moon
somewhere over the rainbow
also behind you

if someone asks you
to repopulate the moon
the least you can do

fly me to the moon
vegas for belgian waffles
margarittavile

siberian dog
here again for the live jazz
just like last friday

parked on your golf cart
watching the sun in the clouds
three ladies photos

husky is husky
enjoying the atmosphere
loves rubbing his ears

day trader by day
sax maniac by evening
moon shines high above

we’re in a new york
state of mind even though we’re
south carolina

never before heard
ipanema of jobim
last sinatra notes

suddenly a dream
chlorine affect’s ones hearing
answer lies on moon

`
9/25/15

every tern a season haiku

`

9/18/15

standing by egret
we have egret on standby
sneaky baby bird

the terns are watching
to every tern a season
we are all waiting

a golf announcer
egret has sneaking long legs
beak has missed twice now

stand by for lift up
these are very tiny fish
fourth try and no dice

you might want to think
about becoming a nice
vegetarian

because two dozen
would only be a light snack
can’t even catch one

minnows are swimming
happily away from bird
walking by their side

`

serendipitous haiku by my love II

~

“it was predicted
news would become sillier
in the seventies

the three presented
with their perfect little beards
perfect little suits

(van gogh experts on bbc)

we’re all going to die
not very helpful is it
in a hurricane

frankly some of the
only normal people i’ve
seen here are drunks

what are you doing
sneaking around behind my
view,blindsided me

all you have to do
is rally someone to hate
and they’ll vote for you

(trump)

I answer this guy
when you say look at the sky
you say don’t pun me

Brighton used to be
the liberal capital
country of england

tell me more of your
mosquito and purell tales
wait with baited breath

(mosquitoes like perfume & in purell)

blind leading the blind
paragraph about the beer
no percent content

is your dress dry yet
are you finished with it now
just use my hanger

don’t know how many
years i have carried this bag
but it’s time has come

cross that off the list
things you can do comfortably
can do with your life

(basketball)

doc wife rips scrotum
these are the success stories
of my country

waitresses big smiles
that disappear the minute
they turn the corner

no one would have thought
he’d take the experiment
this far with the jeans

quite a good tee shirt
Apologies In Advance
back lawyer’s email

~

serendipitous haiku by my love

~

” a lot of cats
looked like that cat for a reason
he was their father

didn’t understand
I was understanding him
understanding you

it’s a classic thing
people have in the afternoon
cream tea and a scone

I’ve had a complete
new perspective on the place
bit of nostalgia

the flattest ocean
I’ve ever seen in my life
guy on a surfboard

they all think they’re in
a commercial and they don’t
even realize it

they looked at us like
we had just broken into
alcatraz prison

it’s one thing talking
it’s another thing ranting
they are quite different

you won’t be able
to get clean air anywhere
on this planet soon

you look at the dog
and tell me it’s my fault
you think he is cute

people are trying
to get out of london and
brighton’s a target

seem to be losing
the ability to speak
in my own accent

i’m starting to do
this weird thing smiling at dogs
i do not like it

we’re all going to die
not very useful in a
hurricane is it

you need to balance
make people responsible
with not panicking

when they start to kiss
the feet of the empty chair
know it’s time to go”

~

may two three love haiku

~

you carry my chair
sent the elevator back
fixed the noisy bath

carried my iced tea
suckle tea from your briefcase
the entire sea

let me use your lap
as my own comfortable chair
after walking far

when i am tired
and can’t walk any farther
the coat off your back

carry furniture
from one condo to other
when people make fun

of the luggage cart
even though they stare at us
every single time

“monkey behavior”
and that’s just the last six hours
of may twenty third

~

fish have band, birds have choir and sharks play poker haiku

`

9/25/15

you are so tiny
jumping out of the water
from two feet away

when you turn around
to see the fish behind you
they make a circle

all at the same time
must be friday band practice
stop searching for shells

fish are excited
fisherman stopped to catch bait
in only one net

went back to fishing
because he caught so many
you can just reach down

she takes the photo
seventy birds singing songs
choir practice too

slowly following
fish back upstream to the pool
choreography

much needed practice
sound like baby chickadees
peeping from chicklets

when you’re almost back
to where the water’s waist deep
shark came two fridays

a group of fourteen
guy carrying a big stick
forgetting these guys

twenty feet apart
two women stand with leashes
long measuring stick

men holding notebooks
the water is two feet deep
girl dropped her iphone

watch her recover
in the fast moving water
lady with big stick

laughs as something crawls
who knows what they are doing
wet and giggling

`

albert the dachshund loves yoghurt

`
cute little dachshund
going potty on beach chairs
mother gives free reign

allowing him to
do whatever he wants to
kisses my fingers

and he was standing
right next to my pink flip flops
thank-you for finding

dog cannot tell time
he’s half an hour early
allowed after five

your secret is safe
mother likes to break the rules
an unwritten law

“if you know albert
like i know albert oh oh
oh what a dachshund”

speaking queen’s english
enjoys his parent’s yoghurt
and a good figure

`